Why ask why?
... well, let's go over this again, Chicago.

I'm sure you've got some rationale or some logical way of explaining this, and I'm just too dumb to understand it, me poor college student with just a high school diploma. But could you reiterate exactly why tomorrow's daytime wind chill is going to be around -35 degrees Fahrenheit?!

Nota Bene: According to xkcd, this is dangerously close to "Spit goes 'Clink!'" temperature. Which... objectively speaking, is kind of awesome; I love when life imitates xkcd. (Subjectively speaking, however... well, let's just not go there.)

Bottom line: aaaaaaah. I have to go dancing. And DJ swing for the night (wtf?!), because everyone else bailed, fuckers. And possibly let a dancer crash on my couch. And work starts Saturday. And I didn't do any of my Chinese homework. And all my personal statements need to be done tomorrow so they can be e-mailed out to my recommenders. And I need to go to sleep now.

I'm going to say this again, because I haven't said it enough this week:

I did not sign up for this, life. You'd better check that clipboard again.